Like that couple with the kids who have allergies to everything you normally eat. Or weird Uncle Mike who always seems to be scratching himself. Or maybe this time it’s that psycho college  roommate you thought had died in the liberation of Grenada. 

Sure they like you but they love free meals, free lodging and free loading off you. And in season only, sucker!  

It may be your house, but make no mistake, it’s their pit stop and personal pleasure dome on Martha’s Vineyard Island.

But the rules of engagement will never be the same now that clear guidelines for proper behavior have been set forth in Official Island Rules for Vineyard Houseguests.   

For the many, many friends and visitors we look forward to seeing, please disregard this book. For the rest of you, these pages are now required reading.